20 Things That Are Hard AF When You’ve Got Depression.

Last night I came across a post on Instagram which highlighted the glamorisation of the #selfcaresunday hashtag. It really made me think about the way we talk about self care, and I realised that I haven’t been very forthcoming when it comes to talking about the daily struggles I faced during my depression.

So in the interest of breaking down the stigma around mental illness, here’s a fairly exhaustive list of the things that were hard AF for me during my depression.

  1. Brushing my teeth
  2. Changing my bed sheets
  3. Washing dishes
  4. Opening post
  5. Answering the phone
  6. Showering
  7. Doing a grocery shop
  8. Changing my underwear
  9. Changing my tampons
  10. Hoovering
  11. Paying bills
  12. Getting my daughter to school on time
  13. Going to family events
  14. Brushing my hair
  15. Wearing deoderant
  16. Walking my dog
  17. Taking out the bins
  18. Cleaning the toilet
  19. Doing laundry
  20. Putting clothes away at the end of the day

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    5 Tips for Online Dating for Plus Size Girls 

    So your fat, single, and ready for a change? But how do you deal with the whole weight thing on online dating sites? Even if you’re body positive, it can be tricky. Trust me I know, I’ve been there.

    This seems to be a challenge that many fat girls face. I’ve had lots of followers get in touch in recent times, asking for advice on how to be honest about their bodies online. So I decided to throw together a few tips for you ladies based on my experience.

    1. Pictures Are Required

    Twelve pictures of your lovely smiley face aint gonna cut it if your serious about meeting soneone. When I’m crusing an online dating app, I automatically disregard profiles that don’t include full length pictures. At least one picture of your body, head to toe, is required. No excuses please.

    2. Don’t Be a Catfish

    We’ve all heard of the dreaded catfishing phenomenon. Some of us have been victims of it. Don’t be that person! You may have been taught all your life to only use pictures that are ‘flattering’, but in the world of online dating honesty really is the best policy. If you take a snap and are thrilled beyond belief with how thin you look in it, don’t use it. Be honest. Be realistic. Be yourself.

    3. Sell Your Self Love

    Believe it or not, people are attracted to people who love themselves. Men in particular, who are so used to super self conscious women, find self loving women refreshing and sexy. Talk about this. Get it across in your profile. You don’t gave to say ‘my name is Emma and I have a beautiful fat body’. But you can say something like, ‘my name is Emma and I’m a self confessed chubby chick’, or ‘cutie with a booty’, or ‘plus size and proud’. Make sure the person reading gets a sense of your self love, they’ll love it!

    4. Leave The Anger At The Door

    Very often I get messages from followers, and it’s immediately clear to me that they’ve got some anger issues. I understand it. The world has been a bastard to you. It’s made you feel worthless, so of course you’re angry. But anger isn’t attractive. And it seeps out subtly in the words you use. Keep your profile positive and upbeat. You don’t want to appear bitter or resentful. That’s really not a turn on.

    5. Open Your Mind, And Your Heart

    There’s one thing that all fatties have in common; we’ve been beaten down. We’ve been taught, for our whole lives, that we’re unattractive and undesirable. But the truth is, we’re just a type. True, not everyone’s gonna fancy us. True, most people won’t. But there are lots of people who will love you for your body, not in spite of it. This can be very hard to accept. Especially for self love and body positivity newbies. But I promise you that it’s true! You’ve got to open up to the idea, so that when one of these lovely humans does message you online, you won’t immediately dismiss them.

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    My Five Favourite Self Love Accounts 

    Following bopo accounts on Instagram is crucial to developing self love and body positivity. Why? Well considering the fact that these days most of us spend more time on our phones than off them, it’s no wonder that the messages we receive through our social media have an immeasurable impact on how we think and feel.

    When we make the decision to start working hard to cultivate self love, a social media clear out is the best first step. Unfollowing/unliking accounts that make us feel bad about ourselves is an incredibly powerful thing. Often we feel guilty about this, as though we are somehow obliged to follow fitness bloggers, celeb chefs and models for motivation. But society has totally warped our understanding of the word ‘motivation’, and the truth is that those accounts do nothing except make us feel guilty, ashamed and inadequate. Goodbye!

    It’s not enough just to unfollow and unlike these accounts though. We’ve got to replace them with accounts that promote self love and body positivity, and will have a positive impact on our thoughts and feelings. Luckily for us, there are countless accounts on both Facebook and Instagram in particular that provide just that! If anything, it could be argued that there are too many accounts that promote the same things, making it difficult to see the woods for the trees.

    That’s why I’ve decided to share my five favourite self love Instagram accounts here:

    1. @strutbymic

    I adore this account. Strut post and repost anything and everything to do with self love. They’re truly inclusive, boasting one of the most diverse pages that I’ve come across to date. I particularly love their celeb content that promotes celebrities who are blazing the trail of positive mental health. This account is an essential resource to anyone and everyone!

    2. @effyourbeautystandards

    This account was created by plus size model and bopo badass Tess Holiday after the hashtag (also created by her) took the internet by storm. It’s now an encyclopedia of all things self love, boldly promoting all kinds of beauty. The account is a shining light for the unconvential and the brave, and is a wonderful resource for those learning to love themselves.

    3. @chooselifewarrior

    The wonderful Danni is an aussy girl who has quite literally changed my life. She was the first bopo account I came across on Instagram just over six months ago. But her account is about more than just body positivity, is about fat activism, which was particularly important to me at the begining of my self love journey. In addition to posting about fatphobia and fatacceptance, Danni is all about inclusivity and diversity. She’s an absolute sweetheart, super down to earth, devoted to her followers, and will be your friend if you need one.

    4. @omgkenzieee

    This girl. DANG! Kenzie Brenna, Canadian bombshell and creator of #cellulitesaturday, is a living breathing rainbow. I shit you not. Everyday she helps almost 200k people across the globe to love who they are, as they are. Kenzie’s message is a simple one, that speaks to people of all race, religion, weight, body type, ability, sexuality and whatever else. Her message of unconditional self love is so powerful, her unwavering passion and conviction shinning through every word and every image, that following her can only improve your quality of life.

    5. @gracefvictory

    Last but by no means least, is Grace Francesca, a plus size social influencer, presenter and author. This girl is my idol! On her Instagram account she posts about everything from body positivity and mental health, to women’s issues and current events, to plus size fashion and style. She’s probably one of the ballsiest women I’ve come across, and she’s just soooo likeable! Her account has shown me that fat chicks can be super stylish, trendy, and current too. Before following her my wardrobe was full of skater dresses and floral blouses. Now I’ve got more body con than anyone would ever need! For a daily boost of sassy self love, look no further!

    So that’s my five favourite self love accounts on Instagram! If you’re not following them, please do. I can guarantee that they will help you in your quest for self love just as much as they’ve helped me in mine!

    xox

    Sarah

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    The Bikini Body Bullshit 

    It’s that time of year again, when our social media becomes saturated by Bikini Body workouts, meal plans and ‘thinspiration’. I’m sure you’ve already guessed that it’s not something that I enjoy. Far from it. But given how pervasive the Bikini Body pressure is in society, I have to face facts and accept the reality of the world I live in. Right?

    Wrong. I refuse to accept that there is any such thing as a Bikini Body, except perhaps in the case of a human body which happens to be clothed in a bikini.

    What I refuse to accept is this; the notion that swimwear is a privilege exclusively bestowed on bodies that have reached a specific standard of beauty.

    Here’s why:

    1. Swimwear is not a privilege.

    The idea that we need to earn the right to wear specific types of clothes creates and perpetuates the idea that some bodies are more worthy than others. What about the fatties, like me? What about the disabled? What about those with extensive scarring, or skin conditions? Those bodies don’t reach society’s beauty standards. But does that mean they are less valuable? No!

    2. My clothing choices are my own.

    When we judge someone harshly for wearing something we think they shouldn’t, what we’re really saying is that those people don’t have, or shouldn’t have, autonomy over their own bodies and their own clothing. We’re saying that they don’t have, or shouldn’t have, the right to express themselves the way they do, and that they should prioritise the comfort levels of others over the free expression of their own personal identity.

    3. Society’s beauty standards are damaging.

    Every year models get thinner. Every year thigh gaps get wider. Every year complexions become clearer, brows more defined, collar bones more prominent, hair thicker and glossier, skin more bronzed, bums perkier, lips plumper. Every year the standard rises further and further out of reach of the vast majority of people. What constituted as beauty in the 50’s is now seen as unhealthy, undesirable and unworthy. What will the standard be in ten years time? Will we require that people have an eating disorder just to try on a swimsuit in the changing rooms? And how many more men and women have to hate themselves into mental illness for us to take control of this rapidly spiralling social problem?

    So… On that happy note, what can be done? Here’s what:

    Put a bikini on your body.

    Congratulations! You now have a Bikini Body!


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    Five Things I’ve Learned About Self Love 

    This time last year I had just recently embarked on the most important mission of my life; to fall in love with myself. Like most people, I suppose, the idea of self love was completely alien to me back then, and I made all kinds of crazy assumptions about the concept. Since then though, I’ve come to understand self love for what it really is, and let go of the misconceptions I had initially, and being the nice guy that I am I thought I’d share them here.

    1. Self love isn’t narcicism or vanity

    Whoever coined the phrase, ‘she loves herself’ has done humanity a great disservice! Most people believe loving yourself is about thinking you’re better than everyone else, looking down on others and acting superior and conceited. This is soooooo not what true self love is about! Instead it’s a humble acceptance and appreciation of ourselves as we are. Funnily enough, self love even helps us to see the good in everyone around us, so if anything it boosts our opinions of ourselves and others simultaneously!

    2. Self love isn’t selfish or self centred

    Another misconception is that self love means prioritising yourself over the needs of others. It’s understandable that people make this mistake, but it is a mistake. Self love means taking diligent care of yourself, so that you can function more efficiently and easily. Someone who prioritises self love eats well, sleeps well, makes good use of their time, cuts out parts of their lives that drain them of their energy, and frees up time to spend with the people they love. They become better parents, better friends, better employees and employers. Who doesn’t benefit from that?

    3. Self love isn’t a destination

    I remember when I was in counselling for depression and learning to love myself. I used to get so frustrated and moan to my counsellor that it was taking too long to learn to love myself. I couldn’t wait to get where I was going, to arrive at self love. After all, it sounded like such a beautiful place. But what I didn’t understand was that self love isn’t a destination. Imagine self love as a never ending spectrum, with no end in sight. You can never love yourself enough. You can never be kind enough to yourself, or show yourself enough compassion. You can always love yourself more than you do right now, and you’re never finished learning how to do it.

    4. Self love isn’t all manicures and massages

    Thanks to Instagram and the endless array of hashtags that accompany images of pampering days, meals in fancy restaurants, retail hauls and pretty, pink, peonies, many people believe that self love is all about treating yourself to the things you want. Unfortunately that’s not true. Believe me, I wish it was! But self love is about hard graft. It’s about knuckling down with your thoughts to understand yourself more. It’s about dragging your tired ass off the couch and into bed an hour before you want to. It’s about finding the courage to stand up to your boss, or your friend, or your partner that’s been taking advantage of you. It’s about getting the hell out of your comfort zone and pushing yourself to finally treat yourself better. Sure, buy yourself the peonies, but don’t think that it means anything other then the fact that you love peonies.

    5. Self love isn’t linear

    This is so true of mental health in general. Everyday is different, every moment is unique. Some days I love myself more than others, and there are some hours when my self love is higher, or lower, than it was an hour before. It isn’t a case of finding self love one day, and then just having it for the rest of your life at a constant, unchanging level. I still have mornings when I wake up and have to consciously choose to love myself. And I have mornings when I wake up positively bursting with self love. Everyday is different and it can be a bit of a rollercoaster.

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    Six Depression Myths Busted! 

    Depression remaims baffelingly misunderstood in Ireland today despite how common it is becoming. Having suffered with what became crippling depression myself, I’m passionate about doing what I can to raise awareness around this dangerous mental illness that takes thousands of lives every year. So I decided to choose six common myths around depression and bust the sh*t out of them!

    1. Depression is Just The Blues

    The biggest and most widely held of the myths, this attitude is a serious problem in Ireland. Depression is not the blues! The blues are a temporary reaction to normal life events. The blues don’t lead to big weight loss or gain. The blues don’t cause people to lose jobs and relationships. The blues don’t contribute to suicide. Depression is a mental illness. The blues is a phase. End of.

    2. Suicidal Thoughts Are Attention Seeking

    Most people who are having suicidal thoughts aren’t going to be too keen to share that information around. However, this doesn’t mean that if and when a person does make the incredibly brave decision to tell someone that they’re having suicidal thoughts, they should he dismissed as attention seeking. Over the past month I’ve been blown away by the amount of my followers who’ve experienced this during their own struggle with mental health, and I can’t help but wonder if being treated that way when I confessed about my suicidal thoughts to my doctor would’ve made me more likely to follow through with them.

    3. Suicide Is Selfish

    I have to admit that this is something I used to believe. But it’s bullshit! Only when I started having my own suicidal thoughts did I realise that suicide can actually be the ultimate act of selflessness. For me, I believed wholeheartedly that I was holding back the people I loved, that my own daughter would live a fuller, more successful life without me. To me, not taking my life would’ve been the selfish thing to do. Of course I know how illogical and irrational those beliefs were, but it’s opened my mind to just how warped our thinking can become in depression, and how a seemingly selfish act can actually be a very loving, very selfless one.

    4. Antidepressants Are Evil

    Another really common misconception, most people still see antidepressants as the enemy. More bullshit! Antidepressants don’t dull your senses or mess with your concentration. They don’t turn you into some sort of brainless zombie. They don’t automatically double or halve your body weight. You won’t immediately take your life the moment you come off them. Like any other medication, it can take time to find the right antidepressant for you, and you may have to deal with some temporary side effects while you find it. But if and when you’re on the right one, you can live a full and happy life with the exact same level of functionality as anyone else and zero additional health risks. Antidepressants are not the enemy. Stigma is.

    5. Depression is Just An Excuse For Smelliness

    This infuriates me. Yes, many people who are depressed struggle with personal hyigiene. Yes, I once went two weeks without a shower. Yes, I smelled. But I also locked myself into my apartment for those two weeks and hid from the world. I didn’t run around full of the joys of life, waving my steaming pits in the air while everyone around me dry heaved from the stench. If you have a colleague in work, or a friend in school, or a brother at home who smells, but otherwise they seem completely happy and healthy, they’re just smelly. If you think that depressed people are just smelly people, then you’re an asshole.

    6. Depression Can be Cured With Exercise

    This is possibly the worst of a bad bunch. It’s true that depression is caused by a lack of serotonin, and it’s also true that exercise produces serotonin. But like all mental illness, depression isn’t some black and white scenario with a quick fix. It’s often caused by a chemical imbalance which exercise can correct, sure. But more often than not its roots are infinitely deeper and counselling is needed to teach the patient how to rewire their brain to combat old destructive thought patterns and encourage new, more positive ones. Claiming that exercise is the solution belittles the patients struggles and is incredibly disrespectful. Don’t do it. Ever.

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    Three Things I Wish Thin People Understood 

    I’m not one for ‘thin bashing’. In fact if I’ve learned anything at all from body positivity its that all bodies are subject to impossible beauty stanards. Buuuuut… As a fat person, I have experienced discrimination at the hands of thin people, a lot. So I’ve put together this post to highlight the top three things I wish thin people understood about fat people.

    1. Fat People Deserve Respect

    I can’t speak for every single fat person on the planet. But I can say that through the body positivity community I’ve met and formed friendships with a lot of fat chicks, and we all have one thing in common; the experience of being disrespected because of our size.

    If I had a euro for every time someone has made a disrespectful comment about my weight, well let’s just say my wardrobe would be a lot fuller. Everyone from so called friends to parents, colleagues and even complete strangers have made snide comments to my face in the past.

    I was once in a River Island store, perusing for a present for a friend, when a snooty sales assistant marched right over to me, intentionally looked me up and down and said ‘we don’t have your size’.

    On another occasion I was in the smoking area of a nightclub when a lad started shouting ‘heffer’ at me at the top of his voice.

    These are just two examples taken from well over a dozen that come to mind when I think of being humiliated and disrespected in public places. There are so many more I could choose from.

    But I want to know at what point in history did mankind make the apparently unanimous decision that fat people didn’t deserve respect? When did our thinking shift from the idea that all people deserved a basic level of respect, to one which was based on size? And also – where were all the fat people when that decision was being made? Why was it made by thin people? When did thin people decide it was acceptable to treat fat people this way? And why is it still an acceptable form of discrimination when almost all other forms have been outlawed?

    Thin person – you don’t need to think I’m beautiful or want to get in my pants. You don’t need to approve of my choices or my life style. But I demand you’re respect, because you have always had mine even though you can be a real asshole!

    2. Our Health is None of Your Business

    This really gets my goat. Do I walk around with a sign on my head that says, ‘please question me aggressively about my health’? No I bloody well don’t, but it seems that I may as well have one.

    There is something about fatness that makes thin people think they have the right to cross a line, a line that they wouldn’t dream of crossing with another thin person. Have you ever heard a thin person ask another thin person if they’re worried about diabetes, or high blood pressure? I certainly haven’t. But these are questions I face regularly.

    If you’re answer to this is that the health of fat people costs the state millions every year in hospital care etc., then why don’t we ask thin people about osteoporosis (a very common result of lifelong thinness) or the wide scale and long term joint damage caused by regular running? We don’t question rugby players about the constant trauma they are causing their bodies, do we? We don’t interrogate people as they walk into their local gym about whether or not they’re taking necessary precautions to avoid injury, do we?

    No, we do not. And this is because those people aren’t fat. We only feel we have the right to invade a persons privacy and demand extremely personal information about their bodies if they’re fat. But the truth is that my health is none of your business, and yours is none of mine.

    Thin person – please stop asking me about my health. Have I ever asked you about yours? Can we just establish some boundaries for Christ’s sake? Or would you like me to start asking how regular your poos are?

    3. Don’t Assume We Want Advice

    If you’re a fat person, you’ve probably learned to do the smile and nod and raised eyebrows thing every time a person offers you some ‘friendly’ diet advice. It’s a skill we all learn at one point or another, how to appear interested and grateful when a thin person starts preaching to you about how to lose that weight.

    The ironic thing is, the thin person usually thinks they’re doing us a massive favour. Because after all, we’re fat so we’re probably stupid and the advice to eat less and move more (on which every single diet/weight loss plan in history is based) will be revolutionary to our poor uneducated and ignorant minds. My eyes are hurting from rolling so much. But the truth is that when this thin person (and let’s face it, only thin people preach about diets) starts raving to us about this diet or that diet, what they’re actually saying is that we need to be different, we need to be more like them.

    The person offering the advice does not have our backs. They are not interested in our happiness. They are not concerned about our health (otherwise they’d be asking us about our sleeping pattern, stress level, bowl movements, etc) (also see point 2 – our health is none of their business!!). They are simply telling us to conform.

    Advice should only be given when asked for. Is that not a universally known truth? Surely everybody gets that? Apparently not.

    Thin person – please stop advising me. I neither want nor need nor appreciate it. And with every piece of unsolicited advice you offer I am edging closer and closer to punching you in the face.

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    Call Me Fat. Please.

    The word ‘fat’ is one of the most loaded words in the English language. Fat means ugly, lazy, irresponsible, slob, unsuccessful, unattractive, unsexy, undesirable, unhealthy, uneducated, weak willed, and about a hundred other negative things.

    Growing up I was always mortified when other people called me fat. And they did. To my face. All the time. They used it as an insult, so to me that’s what it was. To me the word ‘fat’ was a weapon, quick to fire but hard to recover from. By the time I was in my late teens I had developed a deep hatred for the word. I flinched every time I heard it, even when it was used to describe an inanimate object. Every time I heard that word it hurt me. Every time I heard it, it reinforced that self loathing that had been building inside me for years. Every time I heard it, the little girl inside me burst into tears all over again, reliving those horrific memories of humiliation that scattered my childhood.

    So its not surprising that soon after stumbling upon the body positivity movement, I was appalled by how often seemingly bopo activists were referring to themselves as fat. As if it was no big deal, these girls described themselves as ‘fat chicks’, ‘fat babes’, and ‘fat activists’. I couldn’t believe what I was reading, seeing and hearing. I almost felt betrayed by these women. They were supposed to be on my side, but here they were throwing that word around without a moments consideration for how much it was hurting me and countless others.

    However one day I stumbled on a post by one of my favourite bopo activists. The post described how words can be used as weapons only if we allow them to be. She talked about how by having a fear of a word, we give it a power over us, and in turn we give power to others who use it against us. She referenced Fat Amy from the Pitch Perfect movies as an example of how taking that word for yourself and owning it as part of your identity dissolves that power and immunises you from the pain.

    I was gobsmacked. This made sense to me. Suddenly I was questioning my attitude to the word that I had allowed to terrorise me for years. Maybe if I could change it’s meaning I could change its impact?

    I realised that I had allowed the word ‘fat’ to mean so many things to me over the years that I had forgotten what it actually meant. Like bones, or platelets, or eyelashes, it was simply an anatomical term for a part of the body. It was not an emotional weapon but a scientific term. Like any other word used to describe my appearance, such as blond for example, it wasnt a reflection on who or what I am.

    Eurika!

    Though I still felt uncomfortable using it, I began to work the word fat into my language on my Instagram. I started using hashtags like #fatacceptance and #fatblogger. The more I used it the more comfortable I became with it.

    Then, one day last week a guy commented on one of my posts. The post included a topless picture of me from behind, showing the rolls of fat on my back. He commented under the picture saying that I was fat. And a wonderful thing happened. My first thought when I saw that comment wasn’t that I hated my body, or that I felt humiliated or degraded, or any of the thoughts and feelings that used to wash over me when I heard that word. This time, my first thought was this; ‘no shit Sherlock’.

    I wanted to jump up and down to celebrate, to phone all my friends and tell them about this major breakthrough, to run to my counsellors office and share my joy with him. I was so proud of myself for overcoming such a deep rooted fear. I couldn’t believe it. I knew then that the word fat couldn’t hurt me anymore.

    Now I use it all the time, in my Instagram posts, on my Facebook page, in my conversations with people. I can see that people react with shock at hearing a fat person call themselves and others fat. But I explain that to me, the word fat isn’t a weapon to hurt people with, but a descriptive word just like blond, or tall, or freckly.

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    How I Deal With Family Who Still Want Me To Lose Weight

    There’s no doubt about it; once you embrace self love and body positivity there’s no looking back!!! But what do you do when other people don’t share your enthusiasm? How do you handle the pressure to conform?

    I’m a year into my self love/body positive journey, and there’s no question that I’m immeasurably happier and healthier for it. But unfortunately not everybody in my life gets it. And the pressure to conform persists.

    In my experience, the pressure comes primarily from family. I come from a big but very closely knit family full of avocado loving, athletic, juicing runners who take vigilant care of their physical health. As the token fat sheep of the family, I’ve always felt under massive amounts of pressure to tow the line, get my shit together and fit in with the rest of them.

    And while I don’t put myself under that pressure anymore, I do still feel that their expectations of me haven’t changed. Now let me be clear about something, my family love me. They don’t want me to lose weight because they hate me, but because they want me to be happy, to be healthy, and to thrive. And while I don’t internalise that pressure anymore like I used to, it can still be hard to deal with the inevitable, ‘how’s the diet going’ questions that come my way at family occasions.

    So how do I handle that continuing pressure?

    It’s easy to get frustrated when you feel you’re constantly having to defend your new found self love. It’s just as easy to become defensive about your choice to stop hating yourself. Why can’t people get it? Why can’t they just see that I’m happier than ever before and accept that?

    The key thing to managing your response to this is to be compassionate towards whoever it is that’s putting you under pressure.

    In my case, I have to remind myself that this person, whether it’s a parent or an uncle, has been conditioned by society in the same way that I have to believe that there is only one right way to have a body. More often than not they’ve been conditioned in that way for forty/fifty/sixty years. And what’s more, they’ve lived their lives according to the standards of society without ever having had those standards challenged. The bopo movement is still new, still niche and still unkown to most people. So of course it’s going to be difficult for them to get their heads around your comparatively radical way of thinking.

    Thinking this way helps me to find the compassion to respect where they’re coming from. In the same way that their need to change me is wrong, it’s also wrong for me to try to change them. I have no right to impose my beliefs on them. I have no right to denounce them as conservative or backward. So I don’t.

    Instead I simply try to respect their experience, understand their perspective and be grateful for their love.

    The pressure to conform is something that we’ve all lived with from the day we were born. Society says we need to look a certain way, be a certain size, shape, weight, live a certain lifestyle and behave a certain way. And the harsh truth is that even after you’ve made the commitment to yourself not to conform, to live an authentic and loving life, there will always be pressure from society to do the opposite. You can’t change that, so don’t waste your precious energy trying.

    But we have the power to choose how we respond. Do we internalise that pressure? Do we allow the claims of others to infringe on our own convictions about who and what we are? Or do we accept that every single one of us, body positive AND body negative, is simply trying to do our best with the knowledge, understanding and awareness available to us? And that at the end of the day, our only goal should be to love ourselves so unconditionally that the opinions of others simply don’t matter.

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